one must always be prepared to liberate treasure (tendre_posion) wrote,
one must always be prepared to liberate treasure
tendre_posion

having "the talk"

I somehow stumbled today from reading Autostraddle's NSFW Sunday to reading an advice article for mums who are trying to have "the talk" with their daughters. 

And it made me think about my own experience with the talk - mostly the fact that I never got the talk. Not really. When I was in Grades 6 and 7, we had Family Planning QLD come out to the school and give three hour long talks on how babies are made and what hormones do and why I bleed like a stuck pig out of my vagina for 5 days every month and what a condom is. Basically, we were told about the basic mechanics of sex, and at the end, we got to watch a woman have a baby, which let me tell you, has pretty much put me off pushing a 6lb human out of vagina EVER. And this seemed to be enough for my mum. I was in Grade 7 the first time I got my period and informed my mum and that was the end of it. 

But never, in any of those talks was there a mention of sex for pleasure, or what an orgasm was or what the hell my clitoris even was, so you can be sure there wasn't any mention of the word masturbation. There sure as hell wasn't any mention of LGBT relationships (this is now almost 10 years ago!). As an 11 and 12 year old, this satisfied most of my curiosity, because exposure to the internet wasn't nearly what it is now, and it wasn't until I got to high school that I became curious about the other parts of my sexuality. I spent 5 years at an all girls school, and pretty much from my first day there, the word lesbian was thrown around everywhere. At this stage of my little gay life, I had no idea I was gay, even though I knew what a lesbian was. It actually wasn't until half way through Grade 8, when I really started to read ALL the fanfic that I learnt about sex and masturbation and what a vibrator was and the stuff they won't teach you in sex ed. It was also at this point that I had my first kiss, ripe old age of 13. At 15 I'd mostly figured out I was queer and told my friends with mixed reactions, including "how can you know if you've never had sex?". Well, at 20, I'm still a virgin, and yep. Still queer. 

My own experience with sex education is probably why I have no shame in talking about any facet of sex, or concealing the fact that I have a healthy sex drive. 

It also made me think

What was your experience with sex education like? Did your parents ever give you the talk and looking back now, did you learn anything from it? If you ever have children, what would you like to talk to them about that you feel like you missed out on?
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